


Furniture That Does Tricks

by Tigerkid14



Series: Kinktober 2017 [2]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-03
Updated: 2017-10-03
Packaged: 2019-01-08 10:00:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 778
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12252090
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tigerkid14/pseuds/Tigerkid14
Summary: To a cat, humans are just furniture that does tricks.





	Furniture That Does Tricks

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Crimsoncat](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Crimsoncat/gifts).



> This was meant to be part of Kinktober 2017, for the prompt forniphilia (human furniture) but my brain went this direction instead. I think most cat owners can understand.

Maria walked into their apartment absentmindedly, still checking her phone for emails and updates from work, not really paying attention, but not really concerned about ambush because between their security system and the fact that Natasha had been home all day, she knew there wasn’t a chance in the world that there was anything for her to worry about.

Except for one thing.

“Nat?” She called out, seeing the back of the other woman sitting tensely still on the couch in their living room. That was not a natural posture for someone who was supposed to be relaxing on their day off.

Natasha gave her head the most infinitesimal of shakes, barely moving position, and Maria shifted into high alert, scanning the apartment, looking for intruders. She cleared the other rooms first, since she could see no immediate danger in the living room, but after finding them free of danger, she returned to the living room, afraid for a moment that the reason Nat was sitting so tensely was because of some sort of explosive in the couch.

Her point of reentry from the hallway afforded her a frontal view of Natasha on the couch though and she suddenly realized what the problem was.

She relaxed as she pulled out her phone.

“Don’t. You. Dare.” Natasha murmured, barely moving her lips, keeping her body motionless.

“Turnabout’s fair play.” Maria challenged, already snapping pictures.

Despite the noise of Maria coming in and the soft conversation, it was the clicking of the phone that finally did it.

Liho lifted her head from where it had been resting on her paws and sleepily looked across the room at Maria. She chirruped in greeting as she slowly got up, stretching out thoroughly before finally hopping off Natasha’s lap.

Natasha, for her part, relaxed as soon as it was apparent that she was awake.

“You’re deleting those, right?”

“What? And get rid of my proof that the big bad spy is a sucker when it comes to letting our cat sleep on her lap?”

“I just didn’t want to disturb her, she was sleeping so peacefully.”

“Yes, I’m sure she enjoyed her Natasha-bed very much for her nap.”

“You’re not supposed to move when a cat falls asleep on you, Masha, everyone knows that.”

“Of course not, but that’s not going to stop me from wanting photos of it when it happens to you.”

Maria’s phone disappeared from view as Natasha pulled her down onto the couch, then pushed her to lay down and leaned seductively over her.

“Could you be persuaded to trade, perhaps? Those pictures deleted in exchange for…something else?”

Natasha closed the distance and put her lips against the side of Maria’s neck, which the woman had made sure was tantalizingly exposed for just that reason.

“Perhaps.”

Maria’s pulse was increasing, a fact that Natasha could very well feel.

“Or perhaps we could negotiate other terms. You delete yours and I’ll delete mine?”

Natasha considered this. While she considered this, she moved to more comfortably lie across Maria, pinning her to the couch, still ravishing her neck, though her hands began to roam just a bit.

“I think I could agree to tho–Aaagh!” She jerked up suddenly, startling Liho, who had come back into the room, and, without either of them noticing, gotten on the back of the couch.

They didn’t notice, that is, until Liho attempted to change perches onto Natasha’s back and used a little too much claw.

Liho hopped to the floor, indignant at her perch’s reaction, and Natasha sat up, as Maria started laughing.

“Thwarted in negotiations by the cat!” Maria said in disgust. “Are you sure you aren’t some sort of double agent?” She addressed that to Liho, who had turned her back on them and was washing her paws.

Maria finally stopped laughing enough to sit up.

“Come now, Nat, you were a good perch earlier, so surely you must be again. You know what they say: ‘To a cat, humans are just furniture that does tricks.’”

“Well, I would like to continue our negotiations. Uninterrupted.” She directed that to Liho’s still turned back, noting the ears twitching in her direction and taking that as acknowledgement.

She lead the way to the bedroom with Maria quickly following, murmuring about her own desire to pick up negotiations where they had left off.

Liho turned to watch them go, then jumped up on the now vacant couch, turning and settling for another nap.

She didn’t want to follow them anyway. They were hardly suitable napping spots when they were so energetic. She’d let them wear each other out and then they’d be perfect later.


End file.
